Limitless

Took a few of the kids to see Limitless this afternoon.

Good movie. Enjoyed it immensely. Though I have to say, calling it PG-13 was a stretch of someone's imagination.

And if you haven't seen the previews, I'll give you the nutshell: Bradley Cooper is offered a drug by an acquaintance, with the promise that it will allow him to access 100% of his brain, as opposed to the measly 20% we can normally lay our hands on. And his life soars to new heights. He becomes a best-selling author and creates riches untold from the stock market and so on and so forth.

On the drive home, two things happened.

First, I began speaking in tongues, spewing forth the anti-drug sermon to the kids. That's one of those out-of-body experiences that only Moms can relate to. It is automatic and completely out of our control. It just happens.

Second, I began to mentally compile a list of what I would wish to accomplish if I could suddenly access 100% of my brain.

And here's what I've come up with so far.....

1) Play the stock market to make a few quick million. Oh, not so I could jetset. I'm a humble gal. All I want is college funds for the kids, a new kitchen sink, and maybe some new fencing. And is it so wrong of me to want a chauffeur and a personal chef, too? And sue me if I want weekly spa treatments. A stressed-out Mama needs a good back massage now and again.

2) Read all the books that I've ever wanted to read and finish writing all that I've ever hoped to write.

3) Burn and destroy all my many forms of calendars, be they digital, dry-erase, or the freebie from the feed store. I would keep all appointments, parties, soccer games, playdates, farrier visits, IEP meetings, and homework due dates in my magnificently efficient superbrain.

4) Become fluent in Russian, French, Italian, Chinese, and that African clicking language.

5) Learn to the point of mastery all aspects of animal husbandry, thus eliminating all appointments with the vet and the farrier.
Of course, learning this one skill alone may exclude my need for both becoming rich and for mentally organizing all my appointments.

6) Be as good ....no no....hope to be as good as the juggling chick on the Top Mommy Blogs voting button so I could literally juggle the cupcake, weights, the rolling pin, computer, apple, the budget and the blissful baby.

What more could one hope for, after all....?